Evidence 101

EVIDENCE 101...Wherever you go, there you are...

Friday, June 26, 2015

Wut, Wut? Applesauce and Pokery?

You gotta love Judge Scalia. People may mock him, but he is refraining from putting curse words down in history in his opinions with the most glamorous use of jibberish vocabulary known to SCOTUS. The man made me smile more than once yesterday. I would love to be a Justice for one day just so I could come up with some brilliant word phrases like he did as he spoke out in dissent of the ruling on Obamacare. I also have to admire each and every one of our SCOTUS Justices because they tell it like they see it, no holds barred. It's pure applesauce and interpretive jiggery pokery.


So entertaining and I see where he is coming from. His verbage is right on my mind channeling.

Maybe he's been reading my blog and learning word mastery from me. I'd like to think so.


If you happened to be watching Fox News at hours where no man is alive, you would have watched the France event go down in history with the Lt. Col. telling the Fox News anchors how he felt about the terrorist organization. You can say that on television?

Apparently, the sphincter muscles on all the anchors were shriveling up in haste as he said you have to fight back and described the reaction to the incident as "hysterical." He did not mean it was funny, but that it was a sort of news hysteria. From his gist, I gathered he didn't like the ISIS agenda being sensationalized because they want the word out and the news was doing it for them. He said you have to take them out (fight back).

Once he said it like we all feel, the anchors tried to smooth that one over by saying they had to report the news to the people and make everyone aware.


That is exactly what the Lt. Col. was trying to say...blowing things up for ISIS by promoting their dastardly deeds.

Shortly thereafter, they took a break and shut the poor man down. Of course, he got in an apology that "he did not give them what they wanted to hear", but he ended it with "it's the truth."

I know.

You are wondering when I am going to stop with the new WUT phrasing and lay off the B-12 crack. I can't decide if I should run it to death, or maybe stop there. I guess it depends on what spews from my fingers next.

Carly Fiorina

In other non-related news...where did Carly Fiorina come from? That woman is hard balls. I really enjoyed how she diplomatically lays it out on Hillary and the US issues. Although the HP family scowls at her (there are failure business endeavors along with triumphs), she is a very intelligent world analyst. I was amused when she compared herself to Hillary and said, "flying is an activity, not an accomplishment." Bwahahaha! Snort.


I am pretty sure everyone is wondering what I did yesterday after work. Burning a hole in your mind, eh? (That's my Canadian Expressionism)

I went trap shooting. Ta da! So fun. Plus my buddy, the Tuminator was here from Wyoming and I brought him as Show N Tell. He is a great shooter and trap shoots all the time back home. Needless to say, the old farts lapped him up and adored him, plus he shot at the top of the bracket. We were all hosed by a cute North Carolina kid who was in the 100 club. He did not miss. He got to be partnered with me in the Protection Class and I apologized in advance. We had great fun.

So Fargo bragged to all the new guys about Ammoman.com and they all checked out my empty boxes I brought and agreed it was a top notch company. Apparently, they already knew about it, and declared they alternate buying from the club, online, and local sales.

And my shooting?

Suck. Excellent. Suck. OK.

Yeah. It was not pretty. My left shoulder went out and 'ol Tom (an 80 year old sharp shooter) said, "Kathryn, you gotta git yer elbow up."

I was like, "Tom, I don't have anything left. I can't raise it above my elbow."

Yep. I looked like a seizure patient trying to one arm a shotgun, but by golly nothing was going to stop me from finishing.

Then my glasses fogged up from the humidity and sweat and I was shooting blind. I actually did better.

I swear.

Then, in the truck, the Tuminator and I were swapping stories about our ailments and showing each other our bulging discs. The thing about cops, is we are always trying to one up each other.



And then I told him we were ridiculous for talking about our ailments. Next it would be incontinence.

I have no idea how to explain how I went from 29 to ancient in about 2 years.

But at least I got to wipe gun powder on my forehead and drink it through the sink when I went to get some water to gulp down to ward off the humidity strokes we were getting.

And so this morning, I was Googling "how to get woman strong" and I was pretty sure my picture would come up. Close enough:

Kim Lyons

Me and Kim Lyons...we're like twinsies. The other link was something connected to caveman days ending with "ugg" because of the way I typed my words in the search window.

Yeah. Ugg.

Yeah. No.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

Short Tweet To Crazy Town

With the sudden surge of Twitter followers, you would think someone tweeted nekkid pics of my head photoshopped on Jennifer Lopez's body. I mean, even famous people are following me. I do not have many connections in Hollyweird. Ok. One. Maybe two but they are very, very distant.

What in the world? I have no idea what inspired them thar new Tweeters to follow me. Maybe it was my vagina or poop updates.

Is it creepy good or creepy bad or creepy weird?

I bet it isn't as creepy weird as my historical leap back in time to take selfies with John Wayne Gacy.

I didn't even blog about weed. Nor tweet about it.

I pull a lot of weeds out of my garden, but I don't smoke them.
Maybe it is because I don't hide my crazy, I parade it around on the front porch. Crazy is like a train wreck. You can't look away.

I want to take a moment and thank all my supporters. It really means a lot to me that you stick around or are new to this crazy train. I am humbled everyday that you take an interest in my work.

Yeah. I know. I stole that from Hillary. Not really. She wouldn't be that nice. I should leave the poor gal alone. She has been the subject of my scrutiny a lot lately. It's like obsessive. Oh, Hill, you silly old nag.
Not really. I know a lot of whoooores out there and their damn done broke a long time ago. I have no idea why she thinks there are a lot of virgin prostitutes left in the world.

I know it is hard to believe many don't like my Jesus jokes nor my other funnies. I am not making fun of the Lord. I just enjoy a good smile about Christianity. Just because we are serious about God, doesn't mean Jesus doesn't have some humor. I think the tri amigos (father, son, holy spirit) would find humor in this...
A little smile? Come on. Good humor here.

What's the attraction to your Tweeter friends? Facebook? Why do you hang around blogs? 

Is it my intelligent assumptions? My sense of jaded-ish humor? 

I know. It's my B-12 crack attacks. If you feel like it...tweet with me. Face the book with me...or stay right here. Comment. And often. Thanks.

-this post was brought to you by B-12, the Color 9, and grey banned items

Rebel Jack Panic: Playing Capture The Flag and Clearance Sales on Grey Items

Shiver me timbers and call me a monkey's uncle~

Today is a day of ridiculous.


I don't have a fight in the flag issue. It matters not to me what they do in South Carolina. BUT...it is creating nation wide rebel jack panic coupled with erasure of everything in Civil War history unless you are a Union home.

Have we gotten too sensitive? Or are we insensitive?

Like we are all surprised that taking down the Confederate flag has led to other trends like removing statues, changing names of highways and high schools. Now we are getting ridiculous. History cannot be erased, and even though we do not now agree with their agenda...wait, I think MOST Americans disagree with the Confederate agenda. Oh yeah, you mean the majority of Americans think slavery was bad? Duh. Yes. It was a horrible crime. Unfortunately, many of our ancestors-of all colors around the world-had slaves, servants, or indentured workers (slaves). They were not all African-American. Some were white. Some were Asian. It was HORRIBLE. I still cry at movies depicting the inhumane treatment. However, it is OVER. America now has to deal with human sex trafficking. Another HORRIBLE crime.

1. History cannot be erased unless you are a liberal. Believe me. I tried to wipe out my shady past and forget my ex-husbands.

2. Confederate politicians and figureheads still played an important role in the development of our country and laws. The Civil War did happen.

3. Strangely enough, after the abolition of slavery, politicians still worked together. Forgiveness? 

4. Our country has evolved over the years and change still continues. Both the Confederates and Union soldiers were comprised of Christians.


5. If we are going to erase all the Confederates, let's erase all the far left wingers. 

6. Confederates were Democrats. 


How many times can the Republicans say that in a news cast?

7. Perhaps we can just look at names, statues, and the past as what happened then, where we came from and look at where we are going, rather than erase it like it wasn't there. Magic Erasers! Going like hotcakes!
Yes. I thought of this all by myself. Terrible humor attempt.

8. Just because there is a statue, doesn't mean it is a shrine of honor. It is commemorating history...good or bad. 

9. The Republicans keep the flag talk going to take the heat off the gun issues. 


No shit, buddy. We aren't stupid. Deflect!  Over here! Deflect!

10. Oh, yeah. I wore a BLUE uniform. Like most of my life. Booyah!

11. I am getting rid of all my grey clothes as to not confuse anyone and disassociating with that color. Forevah. 


I have a grey car. It's not possible to trade it off.

Poop. Shit.

I bet all grey clothes, cars, paints, and other items go on super clearance sale.

Maybe Crayola will no longer make a grey crayon.

12. The Democrats are cringing at the association with their Confederate army days so as not to lose African-American voters.


Obama is a Democrat.


13. Confederate Rebel Jack Panic is now a medical disorder. 

OK. See how ridiculous I can get? 

I really am just watching on the sidelines and have no strong feelings one way or another except we make some positive peaceloving changes. The End. 

In the meantime, I am inserting my humor everywhere because it looks like someone poured vinegar on the ant pile. Now the word "racist" is diluted. It could mean anything. To me, it is still a very dirty word and I reserve it for those who deserve it.

Maybe we can all agree to drink beer together. 


We would argue about that too.