Is every teenager lazy or related in behavior or by blood to the Tasmanian devil? I believe so.
We had a chat about how Bug's peers have been labeling her and her friends. She hangs out with the volleyball team, so naturally, I thought it would be the label of "jock" or "jockette."
She, as well as her friends, have been called "preppy" and "spoiled." This is not to be confused with the 80's version of this label. It does not involve collared shirts and rolled up pants. This "new preppy" has a negative connotation as "snotty" and "unapproachable."
Or at least I am told.
I quizzed the kid on this labeling thingy.
Photo credit: Grumpy Cat, Pinterest
I had to explore her school persona:
Would it be because you are so worried about how you look, that you browse every mirror every chance you get? No, mom.
Would it be because you get upset if someone messes up your hair or makeup? No, mom.
Would it be because you are fixated on your clothes? No, mom.
Would it be because you walk around thinking you are better than everyone else? Do you have an attitude? No, mom. I don't do that.
Are you exclusive to others not in "your group?" No, mom. I am nice to everyone.
Then what is your theory, honey? Mom, it is because I am associated with the "other" girls on the volleyball team and they are like that, so I get lumped in with them because I hang out with them. But I don't act like that. I just hang around girls that do and so I get stereotyped.
Obviously, much to my dismay, I did not raise a rocket scientist.
Photo credit: Larson, cartoonist
All those golden cheerful bliss years of toddlerism are gone.
Photo credit: Fargo
When Bug was in those small and cute stages, I was a cop parenting everyone else's teenager.
Rotten they were.
I thought (gasp) not my child! OOOOHHHHhh no! My child will never be disrespectful or be naughty like those brats.
Well, I am so far, somewhat correct. She just hasn't progressed to that steady Category Orange stage yet. Some days I think we might reach black at peak episodes, however. Then, we have to take it back down to white or a gentle canary yellow. Now, these staging categories are based somewhat on Cooper's model of situational awareness with a twist of Fargo and some other emotional expert whom I can't remember. This is not to be confused with the Homeland Security Risk staging of terrorism. BUT, it could happen. Teenagers might be classified as little domestic terrorists.
They say we learn from our mistakes. Right? My parents told me that all my life. It must, therefore, be true. Well, I make so many, I must be a freaking genius!
I am slowly coming around to thinking that those who just punched walls in their parents' homes and yelled curse words are much easier than dealing with a teen aged drama queen. I really can't squeeze the princess out of Bug no matter how much I try. She is so concerned with appearance. Town beatings don't even work. Nor do sensible talks.
Cartoon: Bad Paint job?
I would like to drag her around by her pony tail, but I'm told that is not really a cool thing to do.
She is mouthy.
She is lazy.
She is a cyclone of drama.
She spends HOURS in the bathroom getting ready.
However, she is an A+ student and is respectful to her teachers and coaches.
Just NOT to her mother.
I got nothin'.
For the first time in my life, I am stuck without solutions. I have tried everything. I can't change her bad attitude at home. Neither negative nor positive reinforcements work. Like I said, town beatings are not working either.
My friend chalks it up to the teenager years and the lack of "THE PERIOD" showing up.
Lana Banana blames it on hormones.
Can you imagine what I am going to go through during that "natural woman" stage with my child when it arrives?
That will be drama exponentially multiplied. Drama squared.
Help me now.
I foresee a contemporary Wednesday-like character forming. Only in PINK.
Photo credit: Disney, Meet the Robinsons, Lizzy
At least my daughter wears conservative clothing and is very prudish. There are positives!
Otherwise, we might have also amended it to a problem with WHOREmones.
Not on my watch.
Back to the drawing board of attitude reformation ideas.
I should have been a Thespian.