It is no secret I am a master gardener and I owned a tree nursery/landscaping business. Sometimes those talents bled over into my cop work. How? You might ask. Let me take you back in time for a Throwback Thursday moment to explain...
Family fights plagued the city for most of the evening. Sarge and I responded to an all too familiar address. It was the only ghetto rental in the big tree area which was home to moderate income families. Much to the neighbors disgust, their phones often dialed 911 for disturbances.
Sarge had arrived prior to me and had already been talking to the upset male half of the domestic. Apparently, the female half had fled the residence with her "new" boyfriend, leaving her husband behind. Walking up the rickety steps, I found myself in the middle of a garden...only it was supposed to be the living room. Potting soil, plants, pots....thrown all over the front room. To my right was a coffee table that had been "karate chopped". Much to my amazement, the only thing not disturbed was the new flat screen television.
ME: Wow. Been gardening, John?
ANGRY JOHN: (Sigh) Lady, I have been taking anger management classes.
ME: Looks like they are working.
ANGRY JOHN: Look. It's my stuff. I broke it. I can break my stuff.
SARGE: Well, sure you can. However, it isn't a very good sign that your anger reduction plan is even working. Especially when we come to things thrown around, you are angry, red in the face, and the missus has disappeared. Besides, you are bleeding.
ME: I think gardening is a great stress reliever.
JOHN: You don't have to be a smart ass. I live here. I am under control.
SARGW: Apparently not. Look around you.
JOHN: Look I hit things. I don't hit people.
SARGW: Fair enough.
ME: Well...can I give you some advice?
JOHN: Oh, go ahead, lady. Like I have a choice.
ME: Philodendrons and cactus don't go in the same pot. Different climate and soil conditions.