Well, Schweetheart...it's like this. You knew we wouldn't last forever. This day would come. It started out such a great romance long ago, when I was young. I could see it in your eyes. It was love at first sight. You were such a cougar back then. You would scratch my itch, I would lay on your feet. You would snuggle, kiss my face, pull my ears.
I still carry these pictures of you and Bug in my collar. Remember that picture? You were at class and I had to sit around and watch Matlock all day. When you came home, I sure was happy to see you. You had a rough day. I should have taken an "after" picture of your frown and ripped clothes. I still don't know if I believe your story about falling down while running in a scenario. I mean, really? I guess it's happened before.
We'll talk about the stories this week and you can snuggle with me while we watch movies, have a drink, and watch the sunset. Just like real cowboys. I will hold out for Bug, I believe. She should be arriving home soon. Sure miss that kid. In the meantime, I'm going to keep nudging you for attention, scratching these lumps, and smoking my cigars. Just so you know, I'm proud to be agile enough to still scratch my dick with one foot. I know you laugh when I topple over and fart at the same time I'm doing it. I still got it. Pretty amazing for a dog with cancer and as old as I am.. I'm old, Schweetheart. Gotta give an old man a break. Get me another cigar and a drink, would ya?