Evidence 101

EVIDENCE 101...Wherever you go, there you are...

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Station Interruption

In the middle of my answering everyone's questions and posting here, there was a knock at the door. It was Sheriff Mike asking me if I was ready to go. He told me to get "saddled up." That is not something that should be said to someone from Wyoming, so I asked what he meant. He said I was to prepare for anything and I had 5 minutes. Wow. Spoken like a true bossy pants.

What did I do? Duh. (Yuri) I got ready. Yes,  a princess can get ready in 5 minutes. And no, I was not naked when I answered the door. Duh, again.

Halfway to Indy, he told me we were going to the trap range. I told him to turn around so I could get my gear. He said, "Nope. Gotcha covered."

I hadn't shot trap in AGES. Beat me. The sweat started to form on my brow.

Once we got there, it was full of...MEN. Yes, not one woman on the field. Did that bother me? No, except if you are the only woman, they assume you are there to hold their shotgun.

Sheriff Mike opened the back of his truck and brought out two very nice shotguns. Way more pricey than my pocket book could afford. Ammo cans of shells...everywhere. I had a little smirk on my face.  He asked me which shotgun I wanted and I told him the one that hits all of the birds. Duh.

He kindly handed me the most expensive one, which I later learned was NOT his favorite.

I have to admit I was kind of nervous since I hadn't shot a shotgun since December.  Well, no better time than the present to look stupid.

We took over a far station. The first three I missed. Not a happy princess. I'm sure disgust was noted by my cursing and the birds flying out of the automatic thrower because I did not keep my mouth shut.

SHERIFF MIKE: Yeah. Every word you say sends out a bird.

ME: [turn my head and give him the half smirk, I'm an idiot look]

After that...I stopped messing with my head and I was in my groove. Sheriff Mike was sweating bullets and kept commenting on how I was not missing anything. Soon...a crowd came over and put pressure on me which I did not like.

Sheriff Mike asked if I wanted to try out his shotgun. So I did. We went one for one. He missed. I didn't.

It wasn't too long before he made a comment that he wanted his shotgun back because I was "smokin'" him.

We stepped off to take a break. A man sitting on the bench winked at me and said, "That's some good shootin' out there. [yes, the southern drawl in the near south which throws me off]. I politely thanked him and moved away so a couple others could shoot while we loaded back up.

Before that, most everyone had taken a lunch break, so we had the place to ourselves. I asked the sheriff if I could help pay for the trap shooting.

ME: What do they charge?

SHERIFF MIKE: Four dollars a whack.

ME: Four dollars a bird?

SHERIFF MIKE: Four dollars a turn.

ME: Uh, we are done. We just racked up over $600.00. [thinking how are we going to pay for that]

SHERIFF MIKE: No. It's $4.00 for 25.

ME: [relief]Oh. Ok. I had a panic attack.

[serious blond moment]

Sheriff Mike made conversation with some of the men who were talking about me and complimenting my shooting. It probably didn't help that I shot a couple times from the hip because I was talking and set the damn machine off, making the bird go early. I had to shoot then and there or waste my bird.

A group of Japanese men in business suits were there shooting and I believe each of their guns had to be about $20,000 each. High dollar. In not so good English, they asked about the couple hip shots. I told them I got "wild west" training. They did not understand. I said, "rattle snakes."

I don't think any of them understood me. I didn't care. I can tell you it was almost as fun as sex. And that could be noted from my perma grin. Sheriff Mike told the club owners when he came out for competitions that I would be his partner. They said, "No doubt. You are no dummy. "

Thank you, Jesus, that I did not look stupid today.

Best thing was...I got to shoot over 400 rounds of ammo, use expensive guns, and didn't even have to clean a one of them. Being a princess for a day isn't half bad. And no, I'm not telling him that my shoulder is sore and it took everything I had to lift that gun up for that last shot and hit the pigeon.

And now...back to your questions. Yes, Yuri, I know you had more. I'm getting to it. Patience, grasshopper. They will be answered on page 96.


Tennessee Grammie said...

Way to go MF, I'm proud of you!! Shall I drop my maiden name and the NRA in the same sentence the next time I see Sheriff Mike and watch him wince? LOL

Suzanne McCarley said...

You be careful there. He's trying to win your heart and he's smart enough to figure out what you like. I don't know if he wants a mistress or a wife, but I'll bet he wants more than a friend. Go easy on the poor guy - you'll hate yourself if you break HIS heart.

Momma Fargo said...

Tennessee Grammie...I know you will give Sheriff Mike a run for his money. He will swoon over you. Mention the NRA and that will be it.

Suzanne McCarley,

I know. Already had that conversation with him. He does not want a mistress. He wants a companion to share the same things as he does. He is a lot of fun, just too much age difference. I am going to set him up with my Aunt Superwoman. She is a beautiful lady and a lot of fun. She will put a pep in his step...and he's going to need it to keep up with her. LOL

Paxford said...

Sounds like a brilliant day!


[and if you're keen on Matchmaking... :D]

GunDiva said...

Loving your day!

Except I wouldn't have hit a single bird, from the hip or not.

Momma Fargo said...

Pax, I am looking for a nice, hot cowboy for you. However, you must remember my taste in men SUCKS. Warning!


Bull. You would have outshot me in a New York minute! And the hip was just reflex and lucky. LOL