Evidence 101

EVIDENCE 101...Wherever you go, there you are...

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Weird Science

Sometimes, the mind of a teenager is scary. Most times it is, anyway. It still fascinates how my child learns about life things. Last night, we are sitting on the reclining sectional, vegging after a night of track practice, running, and church. So, we decided to turn on American Idol which has been bland to blah this year. The singers really aren't that good. Sometimes there is a moment, and then I fear they suck.

I have to continue to watch it, however, so I can hear Keith Urban say "baby" and watch Harry Connick, Jr. JLo's fashion changes are also interesting. The vocals have been lukewarm.

This caused the Bug to talk. Why? Because if a teenager's mind is not engaged with electronics or television, they don't know what else to do.

BUG: Mom. I learned about different holes today in science.

ME: Oh. Yeah. Black holes, sink holes. Interesting.

BUG: No. Mom. These holes. (points to crotch area)

ME: Huh?

BUG: Yeah. Girls have three holes there.

ME: *blink*blink*

BUG: The butt hole, the vagina hole, and the anus hole.

ME: *snort*cough*snort*

BUG: Mom, stop laughing. I was teaching you about antonomy. 

ME: Anatomy. *snort* wheeze*

BUG: Mom, it isn't funny.

ME: Yes, it is. The anus and butt hole are the same holes.

BUG: Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean the uh...

ME: urethra.

BUG: Huh?

ME: The hole you pee out of.

BUG: Yeah. You have an anus hole, a vagina hole, and a pee hole.

ME: *snort* wheeze* Stop. You are killing me. Did your teacher tell you those names?

BUG: No. I named them.

ME: Oh, good. 

BUG: We have other holes, too.

ME: Oh?

BUG: (puts finger in ears and then up her nostrils)

ME: *snort*wheeze* laughing until I cried

BUG: Mom! This is science!


VandyJ said...

I have boys so the conversations could get interesting. Of course I always have the recourse of go talk to your father.

Jewells said...

Ok...that's the 2nd biggest laugh that I've had since I quit smoking on Saturday.

Thank you Bug...you might have saved someone from being murdered today. And by "today" I mean within the current hour. =D

GunDiva said...

At least she knows we have three holes. I have college students IN THE MEDICAL PROGRAM who have no idea until they take anatomy. You'd be amazed at how many students (girls!) who don't know their own anatomy. For all I know, they think we've got just one multipurpose hole.

Coffeypot said...

I love the things young teens tell us because we the the dumbest people in the world and they are trying to help us learn. There is an anus and a butt hole, though. My old boss was a butt hole.

Slamdunk said...

I am dreading those type of conversations here. I will be inspired to lose weight just so that I can fit comfortably hiding under the desk...

Old NFO said...

Sigh... anatomy... A lost cause... And next is the birds and bees... Good luck with that one!

ravenjanedoh said...

Good Lord. ..Just, O.M.G.

My son believed that babies were just pooped out until he learned about all the holes. - to be honest, I'm not sure he really understands the Female Trilogy Mystery to the full extent still.

Glad Bug got that sorted. - Science is nowhere near as weird as reality, but both are kinda funny most the time. ;)

Bob G. said...

Momma Fargo:
Well, I AM very glad that I decided to swallow my mouthful of coffee BEFORE I began reading the "red" area...!

((good Lord))
That's a "record-scratch" moment for me.
Science can be "weird" that way...LOL!
(biology...even more, which is where such things SHOULD be taught..or in "health" class.

Guess the schools can't WAIT to psychologically scar parents these days?

Good post.

Stay safe (and well-edjumakated) down there.)

Firepuppy said...

That poor child. How much scar tissue will she build up from being raised by Momma Fargo? Poor child.

Mahmood Saleem said...

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